Bonding with your baby

Many women expect that if they’ve been trying for a baby for awhile, they will instantly feel a connection to this intimate part of their body. However, this isn’t always true. Yes, the bonding process begins at conception, but like any relationship, it takes time. Here’s some things to remember:

• Imagine meeting a long lost mother – you will have a connection, but of course you won’t instantly be able to share your deepest secrets. The same is true with a new baby. Like all relationships, time is key.
• Especially in a first pregnancy, it is hard to connect the feeling of little kicks in your stomach with a real live human. Yes, your brain knows there’s a baby there. But sometimes it just doesn’t seem real!
• If you don’t have an instant connection with your baby, don’t be alarmed. It will come. When I first met my baby girl I felt the same as I would towards any small, helpless child. Protective. But I did not feel as if there was any special connection. However, the more time I spent with her (especially after we were back in our own house, on our own schedule) the closer we became.
• Don’t be alarmed if a complete stranger seems better at calming your child than you are, in the first days after birth. Newborns respond to warmth and comfort, without really caring about the source. They also feel stress, which you will probably be experiencing a lot of with no sleep and a new baby! Babies also smell their mother’s milk which can upset them even if they’re not really hungry.